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Sandy
put down her pen, feeling very bitter. Her heart was broken and she felt the
whole world crumbled before her very eyes. Tears started to trickle down her
fair white cheek as her hands slowly reached for her Kleenex.
Ya Allaah, this is too
painful. Ya Allaah, help me, please, please, Ya Rabb, Ya Rabb. Mishan Allaah…
Her heart begged for help and strength from her Lord, The
Most Loving, Al Wadood, as she started to sob uncontrollably. She cupped her
face and let her painful emotion take control of herself.
High fever and flu with nose runny
Severe headache and painful tummy
Dry mouth with blisters throbbing
This was when you decided on sending
An accusing message to kill my physical being
To the world I kept on smiling
Clearly they didn’t know what I was facing
Within myself my mind is numbing
Despite the hot temperature I was feeling
My mind is determined to slowly go into freezing
Stab Bash Smash Whack Clobber Pierce and Slice
This is my heart and next to it- Saw another knife?
Here, take them both honey and do as you wish
Let it have one last bloody hemorrhage fiesta
My emotionless soul would pick it up, later
Then make an honorary deposit into the dumpster
Sandy
put down her pen, feeling very bitter. Her heart was broken and she felt the
whole world crumbled before her very eyes. Tears started to trickle down her
fair white cheek as her hands slowly reached for her Kleenex.
Ya Allaah, this is too
painful. Ya Allaah, help me, please, please, Ya Rabb, Ya Rabb. Mishan Allaah…
Her heart begged for help and strength from her Lord, The
Most Loving, Al Wadood, as she started to sob uncontrollably. She cupped her
face and let her painful emotion take control of herself.
Moments later, Sandy
laid back against her chair and stared into the empty sky through her window.
Despite the sorrow she was going through, deep inside her,
she knew one thing. She knew that her Lord says,
We do not impose on any self any more than
it can stand. With Us there is a Book which speaks the truth. They will not be
wronged. (Surat
al-Mu'minun: 62)
I can go through this.
I know I can. Allaah loves me. There are wisdoms behind this. I just don’t know
them yet. I just don’t know them yet…
Sandy
talked to herself. She knew the words of Allaah. She just had to remind herself
about them. Allaah has said that He shall not test His servant more than she
could bear. So, this must be bearable for her. It must be.
She remembered one of her favourite poet, Kahlil Gibran
said,
Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin
brother. 
Kahlil was right.
Doubt is too painful to bear. She could not live another moment in doubt. She
must be positive. She must be strong. And remain strong.
Sandy knew this was her only remedy- Her
unwinding faith to her Lord, trusting Him, His Plan, His Judgement
wholeheartedly.
One verse popped
into her heart. Her Lord has said this,
Say: "Nothing
shall ever happen to us except what Allah has ordained for us. He is our Maula
(Lord, Helper and Protector)." And in Allah let the believers put their trust.
( , At-Taubah, Chapter #9,
Verse #51)
Of course! This is the Plan which Allaah has put in for her.
And Allaah is the Perfect Planner. She knew that she must trust Him with His
Plan because He is her Protector and Helper. She also knew that His plans will
never harm her or any other creatures.
And that’s when she remembered singing with her mum this one
song, Que Sera, Sera,.. what will be, WILL be.
And in Allaah, she put her trust because she knew, what will
be, will be…
Copyright © Sis Zabrina 2007
Sis Zabrina is a ‘Life Storyteller’ who writes about daily happenings in life, viewed and analyzed
from a unique perspective and blended
with the Quranic verses and Hadeeth of the Prophet SAW for a solution to
illustrate the easiness, simplicity, relevancy and completeness of Islam to
today's world. She maintains an active blog at http://wisdomthruwords.blogspot.com
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